today . . .

i started the day grinding wheat for waffles for 17 people. we have had the honor and pleasure of hosting a wonderful family for the last 3 weeks during a prayer strike at our house of prayer. it's been great. but they've been fasting, so today was our only meal together.

then i went to church and led worship all by myself, i think for the first time ever, just me and the piano. it was very sweet and delightful. i enjoyed it immensely. i think it surprises people in a church that normally has a full band to have just a voice and piano on sunday morning, but in a way, i think it somehow puts the impetus for worship on the entire body, and people pick that up and run with it.

then i taught sunday school, 4th and 5th grade.

after church we went to my second daughter's birthday party - ice skating. in honor of her special day we sent all her friends home with bruises and blisters, which is what you do for birthdays.

i'm home now, and beat. that's a full day for me. but what is really on my mind is tuesday. on tuesday 2 very important things happen.

i will go to see my ob for the first time for this pregnancy. now, this being my 11th first ob visit, you might think that is in the not-big-deal category. but the first visit is when they look (ultrasound) and see that you do in fact have a baby growing in your tummy, as opposed to just being 4 weeks late starting your period with nausea and a positive pregnancy test. but it's a big deal. seeing that everything is okay, a heart beat, a due date, the right size, having blood drawn, none of that becomes less significant the more kids you have. IT BECOMES MORE SIGNIFICANT. i know, better than most maybe, how very magnificent each of God's special creations are.

which brings me to the other incredibly important thing that happens on tuesday. we're going to be presented to a birth family to be considered to adopt.

both these events are important for the same identical reason: life. whether it is life in my womb or someone else's, life that was intended by man or woman or life that God hit the override button, whether it is life that that is exactly what you thought you wanted or life that is different from everything you had in mind, life that looks just like you or completely different, life that is perfectly healthy or life that has lifelong medical issues, life that becomes a rocket scientist or life that never leaves home, regardless, life created by God is a special creative active deliberate miracle. it is a delightful treasure and a blessing.

so as busy and active as my day was today, my heart burns for tuesday, and whatever miracles it reveals. what will God do in me, with me, for me? what majesty will He show us? i delight in His ways, in His Word, and in His works. i'm so thankful for the privilege of carrying His miracles these eleven times, and i'm in complete and total awe that He would consider allowing us to receive a life He created outside my womb into our family, into our arms.

so full of prayers for our birthmom, for the dad, for the baby, for each of them to have a hope and a future, for them to know the love and mercy of God, for them to make the best possible choice, to have wisdom and comfort and peace.

and so thankful. God is good.