Friday, February 26, 2010

i lost the baby

well, not really. she's right here. what i lost was the equivalent of the baby. i lost what she weighs. i picked her up this morning, stepped on the scale, and it read the number it read the day i started my weight loss journey. she was fully dressed and hadn't had her morning diaper change yet either - bonus points.

it is my goal to eventually lose all my children but one. one at a time, i will pick them up and stand on my scale and see that number pop up. when i lose my oldest son, i will be at a truly healthy weight for me. i don't think i'll be able to pick him up and stand on the scale though. i doubt he'll still weigh a hundred pounds by the time i lose it.

i can't lose my eldest daughter. she's taller than me. someday i'll weigh less than her.

i feel thinner. sometimes i feel like there's less of me. my face looks different. i can breathe in my skinny jeans. even though right now i'm sick and am operating on less air, it is still easier to move around.

i'm not needing food as much now. emotionally. i've been visiting biblegateway.com with my crackberry. there is peace to be found in the Word of God that i can't find anywhere else.

i delight in Him. that's all.

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