Tuesday, December 15, 2009

what passes for a Christmas song (grrr.)

my kids and i love the Christmas station. but this year it has been bringing me down. it seems the ratio of Christ-mas songs to holiday fluff-n-crap has gone down.

most of the Christ-mas songs are borderline : the a-scriptural do you hear what i hear (i like the part where the king says to the people everywhere, listen to what i say . . . a child, a child shivers in the cold, let us kill all the baby boys two and under in the region so he won't grow up to be king . . . oh wait, that's not in the song, it's just in the Bible); or the many versions of o holy night with words left out that might point to Jesus, like "truly He taught us to love one another" or "let all creation praise His holy Name" or "His power and glory ever more proclaim", instead, let's just say 'noel' over and over again because that's Christmassy but doesn't really mean anything offensive; or pa rum pa pum pum. borderline.

and then you have the songs that are santa, rudolph, elves, whatever. and those are a distraction, i suppose, but don't make me so angry.

no, it's the holiday love songs that make me want to hurl my peppermint white mocha. last Christmas, i gave you my heart; the Christmas stalker songs; and the worst, worst, seductive borderline date-rape song "baby it's cold outside". listen to the words. in real life, if this song was taking place, she would have cause to take him to court. "the answer is no, my mother is worried, say, what's in this drink?" those are signs to back off, not press in. and just in case we're not sure about it, there's a version being sung by one of the biggest pervs in the biz - rod stewart. and he's singing with the lady with the biggest boobs in the biz - dolly parton.

if that's a Christmas song, bah humbug.

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